The Box Hoarder

If you sell on eBay for a living or if you have ever have dabbled in selling online at all, you may be able to identify with me.

My name is Celeste and I am a box hoarder.

I didn't become a box hoarder overnight... no sirree. Like all bad habits it was a compulsion that had a gradual start then blossomed into a full time addiction.

I started slow with eBay, way back 10 years ago when I discovered it. I was somewhat intimidated and got my feet wet bit by bit, selling the odd item here and there until I became more comfortable and accustomed to how it all works. I would sell an item then look for a box to pack it in once the item had sold. I discovered that doing so often left my shipping estimate somewhat short and I lost money on the mailing of the item.

The solution to this problem seemed obvious to me... stock more boxes and have a preselected box before listing the item on eBay. This way you would always know exactly what the shipping would be and it did prove to be a success in very short order.

The unfortunate side effect however was a pile of boxes steadily accumulating in my basement. Yes, many got used but there is always more boxes to be had. They are practically giving them away you know.

At first this was tolerable. It was easy enough to set apart some space in the roomy basement of my large house in which to store my packing materials. Soon an entire room was filled with boxes. Folded boxes, boxes in boxes, mailing tubes and bubble mailers and of course, all the stuffing accoutrements that went along with them. A heavy desk my husband dragged home from work because it was being discarded soon joined the party. It made a great shipping table and had drawers to store all the tape and tissue and bubble wrap needed to protect the items being sold. It seemed a valuable addition but soon proved to simply be in the way of the boxes. The desk moved to an adjacent room and soon the boxes owned the entire space.

I sometimes felt that they must be reproducing in there... wanton box orgies were happening after I closed the door and they were making babies with gay abandon. Not that more boxes would be a bad thing but all those little baby boxes didn't seem to have much use.

Still, this situation was acceptable because they were downstairs and out of sight and out of mind (until I needed one of course).

Then came the divorce in 2004. I would have to move my precious boxes and to a home substantially smaller than the one I was living in. Some boxes could come with me but they would have to be my very favourites. Some would be used to pack my belongings so they too would make the trip and be put to work at the same time.

However, some would have to go. There was just no other way. I was consoled only with the thought that there are always new boxes by the roadside and in the grocery stores that were looking for homes and a meaningful life again.

So... when I started over again in a small three bedroom cottage on Lake Erie I had only a very small compliment of boxes. Just the best of the best. Soon though, the box brigade started up again. Still selling on eBay meant that new boxes had to keep coming in and Port Colborne proved to be even more box wealthy than Caledonia had ever been.

Now, with no basement and only one small room to spare for storage, the boxes threatened to take over again. They were competing for space with my SHIT.... but SHIT is another topic and one that the late George Carlin did best me thinks.

For the last year I have been trying to keep a handle on the situation but every once in a while I notice it is getting out of hand again. When this happens I need to purge and that is so hard when you love all your boxes.

It's also harder now because the boxes have started to talk to me. I cannot tune them out.. I hear them in my head and it is very disconcerting.

"Celessssste.... don't cut me up and throw me out... I have been with you for 8 years now... you can't get rid of me... I am part of you..... I understand you..... you need me"

It is so difficult to discard a perfectly good box that somewhere, I know, lies the perfect item that could be shipped in it. I admit to getting better but I know the only real solution is to give up eBay. When I do I will be box free and may have some normalcy in my life again.

Until that day... the boxes rule.